


A Merry Little Christmas

by FredAndGinger, SpinalBaby



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Jewish Character, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, F/F, Getting Together, Holidays, M/M, Post-Canon, Ugly Holiday Sweaters, it's jeremy he had hanukkah, its lit, mostly metaphorically, so Brooke has a christmas party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-21 21:47:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13152684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FredAndGinger/pseuds/FredAndGinger, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpinalBaby/pseuds/SpinalBaby
Summary: Maybe Christmas was saved after all.The gang gets together for a fun and relaxing holiday party that ends up being anything but. Read to find out what Holiday Spice Pepsi, raw chicken, and party cannons have to do with the Spirit of Christmas.





	A Merry Little Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> So my other fic is gonna be a little late because SpinalBaby and I wrote this instead! Happy Holidays! Feliz Navidad! We love you and we hope you're having a good holiday season!  
> -FredAndGinger

Jeremy sat heavily on the bench at the mall, his face in his hands. _Fuck, I’m never gonna find that guy_. He felt Jenna give him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. 

“Come on, Jeremy. We’re already late.” She said, offering him a hand to help him up. He groaned. 

“It’s hopeless. I’ll never find the guy.” 

“Come on, we still haven’t checked Claire’s.” Jenna said, her voice bordering on hopeful. That was weird, but Jeremy assumed it was because he was so pathetic she needed to cheer him up. He was about half right. 

You see, they’d been in the mall for the past hour and a half, late for their post-Christmas-holiday-gathering at Brooke’s house, looking for one of the guys who knew the guy at Spencer’s who had a can of Pepsi Holiday Spice. Why? Because earlier that week Jeremy had overheard his best friend lamenting that “it just wasn’t Christmas without it” and that he “couldn’t find any in time”. 

So of course, when he found out that there was one can left, he had to have it. He’d even pay the outrageous twenty dollars, just for his best bro. 

Now Jenna, on the other hand, was there for a more nefarious reason. She was trying her damnedest to play the “holiday matchmaker”. She’d been put in charge of the “random holiday gift exchange” and had “randomly” put the couples of their friend group together. Well, technically they weren’t couples _yet_ but they _would be_ if they all weren’t so stupid. 

At least Chloe and Brooke had figured it out by now. Jenna had to give it to them, she knew that girls were smarter than boys. 

So, with that in mind she couldn’t exactly leave Jeremy without a ride on his romantic quest to the mall to buy his _true love_ a disgusting soft drink. That would be criminal. 

Both of them, however, were rethinking their plan as the guy was _nowhere to be found_. 

“Come on, Jenna.” Jeremy said as Jenna pulled him off the bench, “It’s hopeless. Why would he be in Claire’s?” 

“You never know.” Jenna said. He groaned dramatically and followed her to the pre-teen ridden, dripping pink store. 

Jeremy was amazed to find, between the flower crowns and the clearance Justin Bieber merch the guy from Spencer’s Gifts. He looked distraught as he held two pillows with inspirational-yet-vaguely-sexual quotes emblazoned on them. 

“Hey,” He called. Spencer’s guy looked up, “I got your twenty dollars.” 

“What?” The guy asked. It was hard to hear over the shitty pop music. Jeremy waved a twenty-dollar bill in the air. The guy nodded and led the teens out of the store so they could hear each other. 

“You wanted the weed?” The guy asked, digging through his coat. 

“No, I wanted a can of Pepsi Holiday Spice?” Jeremy asked, frowning. 

“Oh! You sound like a girl on the phone, man.” The guy said, reaching into a different pocket of his coat, “That’ll be fifty dollars.” 

“Fifty dollars?” 

… 

On the other side of town, Brooke was anxiously looking at the clock. _Where are they?_ as she resisted the urge to walk into her own kitchen and see what the hell was making all the noise. 

She knew what was making all the noise. It was Jake. He’d promised to make the food for their gathering, but he had so many other obligations that he’d almost forgotten, so he was forced to make everything _that day_ in her kitchen. 

It sounded like something was shattering. Brooke started to get up, but Chloe’s hand on her arm stopped her. 

“Brooke, it’s fine.” Chloe said, “Listen, they’ll be here soon. I won’t leave until they get here.” 

Brooke sat back down and leaned her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder. She wished Chloe didn’t have to leave at all, but she had to visit her grandma in the hospital for a little bit. Her grandma was probably fine, Chloe assured her, but she was still going to go see her. 

Brooke understood, of course she understood! Family was important. But secretly she was a little sad, despite all her planning it looked like the party was fated to end in disaster. 

“The last thing I gotta cook is the chicken!” Jake called from the kitchen. Rich looked at the couple across the room. He was holding a party cannon. 

“Party cannon?” He mouthed. Chloe shook her head. He looked disappointed. 

Brooke wasn’t sure why she’d allowed Rich to bring a party cannon into her home. Sure, it only shot confetti, but still. It put her on edge. 

“Let’s play a party game!” Christine said. Brooke held back a wince. Christine had already had them play two other party games, with little success. None of them were drunk enough to be fun and half the group was too on edge to focus. Christine started to hand out headbands. 

“This’ll be fun!” Chloe assured Brooke, putting a headband on her girlfriend. She was really trying to be cheerful. It was kind of weird. “Come on, you love Headbands.” 

“Yeah,” Brooke said reluctantly. She had no idea who was on Chloe’s headband. Who was Herbie? She looked around at the other players, unable to recall who a single of the characters on anyone’s head was. _This is going to be a disaster._

Michael was by the bowl of eggnog. Brooke was starting to get nervous, she’d seen most of their friends hanging out by that table, but she had a family tradition that the first glass of eggnog was to be drunk as a toast, no one was allowed to touch it before then. Hopefully none of her friends were drinking it already…. 

“Come on, babe,” Chloe said, pulling her off the couch, “Let’s go mess with Michael. He knows weird shit, so maybe he knows what your headband character is.” 

…

“B-but you told me it was only twenty dollars!” Jeremy protested. The man crossed his arms. He was holding the Pepsi, it was so close... 

“Listen, kid, I’ve got Christmas shopping to do. My ex is letting me have the kids today and they expect _presents_. So it’s fifty dollars or you leave me alone.” 

“But I’ve only got twenty!” Jeremy protested. Spencer’s guy shrugged. 

“Then I guess you can’t have the soda. Sorry kid.” He said. He started to walk away, but Jeremy’s hand, acting of its own volition, reached out to grab him by the arm. 

“Dude, you can’t just--” Jeremy began, but he was cut off by a fist to his face. He went down, holding his nose as blood gushed between his fingers. His vision was swimming and he couldn’t focus on what was happening in front of him. 

All he knew was that he heard the phrase “Hey, I’m not about to punch a girl” and he heard a loud noise, and then, rolling away from him, was a dented can of Pepsi Holiday Spice. He dove for it. 

“Jenna,” He said, louder than probably necessary, “Run!” 

Jenna, it turned out, was straddling the Spencer’s guy, mid-punch. Jeremy dropped his twenty dollar bill on top of him and they bolted, running for the exit before security could be called. 

They scrambled into Jenna’s car and buckled, breathing heavily as she peeled out of the mall parking lot. Jenna glanced over at him. 

“You got blood all over your Christmas sweater.” 

“It’s a Hanukkah sweater.” Jeremy said, trying to stop the blood from his nose.

…

“Dinner is served!” Jake called from the kitchen, bringing out a covered tray with what Brooke assumed was the chicken-or-turkey. She let out a sigh of relief, _thank god_ , the game was going horribly and Christine was getting increasingly frustrated. 

Brooke supposed she understood why. Christine’s family had been one of those “no TV, no magazines, no media before 1970” type families that like celebrated Christmas by going to _church_. Christine had thrown herself into this party with reckless abandon. 

She’d done _weeks_ of research leading up to the party, watching Christmas specials late into the night to research her games. And now nobody really cared that much about playing them, nor could they match her newfound expertise.

Rich, overzealous as usual, was leaning over Jake as he set out all the food and carved the- chicken. That was a chicken, right? When he cut in Rich called out his claim on the first piece and grabbed it from the bird, taking a bite. As Brooke got closer to the table she realized the chicken was indeed a chicken and still very much raw and pink.

“Rich, wait!” Jake and Brooke yelped, almost in unison, as if realizing this fact at exactly the same time.

“What?” Rich asked, swallowing what may have been his third or fourth bite of _raw chicken_. “Chicken is great, Jake.” 

“The chicken is _raw_!” Brooke gasped, “Spit it out!”

“Spitting is for quitters,” Rich said, on instinct, “Wait, _raw_? I thought it was just like… medium rare?”

“Chicken isn’t supposed to be _medium rare_ , idiot!” Chloe yelled, while Jake hovered nervously. 

“Yeah, you’re gonna be sick dude.” Michael chimed in, through a mouthful of mashed potatoes. “Everything else is good though, thanks Jake.” 

“What’s going on?” Christine asked, walking back from the table with the eggnog, where she seemed to have been getting the last of the ritz crackers. Brooke took a deep breath to calm her nerves. 

“It looks like dinner is going to be vegetarian this year!” Chloe said. Brooke could see her putting her best effort in to save the situation. 

“Good, because I am a vegetarian.” Michael said, having moved on to the cooked carrots. 

“Michael, you ate chili fries last week.” 

“That meat is 80 percent sawdust so I am 80 percent vegetarian.” Michael amended. 

There was a knock on the door. 

“Oh thank goodness, that must be Jenna and Jeremy.” Brooke said, walking to the door. Michael bolted past her, opening the door first. 

“JEREMY!” Michael cried, throwing his arms around his best bro, “It’s been so long!” 

“Michael, you were over every night of Hanukkah. And every night after it too.” Jeremy said. Michael backed up, holding him at an arm’s length. He frowned, seeing the dried blood on his face. 

“What happened to you?” He asked. Jeremy looked mildly panicked. 

“Hey guys, look up!” Jenna said, pointing at the doorway. Jeremy and Michael were standing under the mistletoe. Neither of them looked up. 

“One sec, Jenna,” Jeremy said, “I, uh, won this for you in a fight.”

He presented the dented can of Pepsi Holiday Spice. Michael took it reverently. 

“A fight? You can’t fight! Jeremy, you’re like 85 pounds, who would lose in a fight to you?” He asked, before looking down at the can, “Jeremy! You got me Pepsi Holiday Spice? How did you find it?” 

“Guys, you’re under the mistletoe!” Jenna said, trying to make it a moment. 

Michael pulled the can tab. There was a hiss, and then soda erupted into the sky, spraying all three inhabitants of the hallway, the mistletoe, and the white carpet. From deeper in the hall, there was a horrified gasp. 

“I’m so sorry!” Michael said to Brooke, who looked like she might have an aneurysm at any moment. 

“It’s fine,” she squeaked, “Just… go to the living room.” 

Chloe pushed past her girlfriend and gave her a soft kiss goodbye, handing the blonde a stack of towels. “Be right back. Hold down the fort while I’m gone, babe.” She said, only half joking. With that Chloe was gone and Brooke sighed, turning back toward the living room.

“The mistletoe--” Jenna tried to protest, but the boys were already gone, out of the way of Brooke. “Fine. I guess I’ll just go spike the eggnog or something.” 

Christine made a beeline for the boys, handing Jeremy a headband. He put it on, knowing the game like every good theater kid, and looked around. He had no idea who any of the characters were. It probably didn’t help that he was Jewish. 

All Michael’s said was “Jack”. Who the fuck was Jack? 

“Like Jack Sparrow?” He whispered to Christine. She laughed, like he’d said something funny. She gave him a loving, yet painful punch on the arm. _Fuck_.

“Hey, you’re here!” Rich crowed, holding a cylindrical object in the air, “The gang's all back together! _Party Cannon!_ ”

“Wait, no!” Brooke called, but it was too late. The cannon of party was set off with a thunderous BANG. 

It turned out that there’s such a thing as a defective party cannon. And, despite the fact that Rich had terrible aim and had shot it across the Christmas tree instead of the guests, the fiery confetti that came down from it was horrifying. 

Brooke screamed. Rich screamed. Everyone screamed. 

“The presents!” Jake yelled, taking off his letterman jacket and beating at the flames. It had been a relatively small blaze, so it died down quickly. Brooke took a tentative step forward. 

The tree was singed. Most of the presents were singed. But the object that had taken the most damage was Brooke’s present, the one she’d gotten for Chloe. 

“Oh _no_!” She cried rushing forward and ripping the paper from it. The sweater she’d bought for Chloe had been blue, her favorite color, but now it was almost entirely black with holes through the middle. 

The room was silent as Brooke held the destroyed sweater for everyone to see. Rich dropped the party cannon behind the couch. 

“This was our first Christmas together.” Brooke said, her voice choked up. 

“I’m so sorry, Brooke!” Rich said, reaching forward like he wanted to comfort her. Jake put his hand on his shoulder, holding him back. 

“It-it’s fine.” She said, sniffling, “It’s okay. She’ll understand.” 

“Yeah, of course she will.” Christine said, “Let’s, uh… let’s just eat some food, okay?” 

Brooke nodded and they all sat down to eat. 

…

About half and hour later, Chloe walked back in. She kissed Brooke on the cheek. 

“Hey babe, why does it smell burned in here?” 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Brooke said, giving Rich (who was hovering by the eggnog, far away from her) some hard side eye. 

“Well, um… we can have eggnog! You wanted to have eggnog when we were all here!” Chloe said, leading her girlfriend over. 

Michael, hearing about the oncoming eggnog, ragged Jeremy over to be first in line. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you’d never had eggnog before, bro?” Michael asked, “I would have gotten some for you!” 

“Michael, my family isn’t really into the whole ‘Christmas tradition’ thing, seeing as we’re _Jewish_.” Jeremy said, accepting a full cup from him anyways. 

“Excuses.” Michael scoffed. He leaned over to Jeremy, whispering to him, “I spiked it a little, bro.” 

“Sweet.” 

Actually, it turned out that nearly everyone had spiked the eggnog. In fact, only Brooke, Chloe, and Jeremy _hadn’t_ spiked the eggnog, for various reasons. 

“Before we drink this,” Brooke said, “I wanted to say that… you know, despite the fact that not everything has gone according to plan, I’m really happy we’re all here together tonight. I love all you guys and I don’t want to imagine another year without you as my best friends. We’ve been through some hard times, you know… that weird ecstasy trip or whatever, but we pulled through and I feel like we’re all stronger because of it. So, happy holidays, and hopefully the New Year makes us closer than ever!” 

Everyone took a drink. Jeremy downed his whole glass in one go. 

Brooke shrieked. 

Michael looked at his glass. _I don’t remember putting that much in the eggnog_ , he looked over at Jeremy, whose glass was empty, _no_.

Jenna grinned at the burn. She knew that she wasn’t the only one to spike the eggnog. _Good._

Rich made a face. He’d only put in half a flask of Rum Chata, he didn’t think it would be that alcoholic? He really just wanted it to put Brooke at ease after the fire… 

Jake’s advanced flavor pallet detected hints of his own brandy, everclear, whiskey, Rum Chata, and… was that Kinky’s Blueberry Vodka? _Oh good, I didn’t want to remember this night anyways_.

Christine winced, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I didn’t think I put that much in!” 

“This is not just _you_ , Christine.” Chloe hissed, glaring around the circle while her girlfriend looked at the punch bowl in horror. 

“My- my family recipe! It’s ruined! I worked so hard on it!” Brooke cried. She looked close to hyperventilating. Chloe put her hands on her shoulders. 

“Brooke, Brooke look at me.” 

“This party is a disaster!” 

“It’s not a disaster! We can save it!” 

“How can we possibly save _this_?” Brooke asked, gesturing at their terrible friends. 

“A drinking game! We can play a drinking game. We’ve got the booze.” Chloe said, pointing at the eggnog, “It’ll be fun.” 

“I think I need to lie down.” Jeremy said, stumbling into Michael. 

“Oh shit,” Michael said, guiding his friend down to the floor. Jenna grinned in the background. Chloe didn’t know what that was all about. 

“What do you want to play, Brooke?” Chloe asked. Brooke gathered herself a little. 

“ _Not_ Truth or Dare.” She said. Chloe nodded, a good idea. 

“Not Truth or Dare,” she agreed, “Spin the Bottle? You and I’ve kissed nearly everyone in this room, so it’ll be easy.” 

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s fine.” Brooke said, “I’ll go find us a bottle.” 

Brooke was presented with three bottles from various friends who may or may not have spiked the punch. She took the Blueberry Kinky’s bottle from Christine.

Spin the Bottle went smoothly for the first few rounds, people getting into the groove of it and drinking and laughing. Then it was Michael’s turn to spin. This was when Jenna would strike. 

Michael spun the bottle. 

“Look over there!” Jenna cried. Everyone looked, fearing disaster. Jenna moved the bottle so that it pointed to Jeremy. 

Jeremy, she noticed, had not looked with the rest of their gullible friends and was frowning at the bottle as if it had magically moved to be pointed at him. _Damn, maybe he’s a little too drunk_. 

“Made you look!” Jenna jeered childishly. Jake, Rich, and Michael cackled like it was the funniest joke in the world. Chloe rolled her eyes. 

“Oooh, looks like it landed on _Jeremy_ ,” Brooke said, taking a deep sip from the spiked eggnog. 

“Oh! Uh, cool!” Michael said, sounding nervous. He wiped his hands on his jeans, “Cool.” 

“Come on, Mike, we haven’t got all day.” Jenna said, hoping to divert attention from herself. Michael glared at her, he hated being called “Mike”. 

“Fine, fine,” he said, moving closer to Jeremy. He put his hand on Jeremy’s shoulder, steadying him. They both leaned in at the same time, their lips meeting in a soft kiss. 

Then, Jeremy’s tongue was in Michael’s mouth. He wasn’t really sure how it got there so fast. Jake catcalled. Michael wasn’t exactly complaining except that he _was_ because this was _way too public_ and he’d had a _crush on Jeremy_ for _five_ years. 

Jenna made an unholy noise that only small dogs could hear. Michael wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing, he just knew that he was really into having Jeremy’s fingers running through his hair and that he needed to _leave_. 

Michael rushed off to the only safe place in the house, the bathroom. Jeremy blinked a few times, looking like he didn’t know where Michael had gone at all. 

“Where’d he go?” Jeremy asked. Rich was holding his stomach laughing. Why was he laughing so much? 

“He went to the bathroom, sweetie.” Brooke said, looking less disturbed than she had all night. She took another sip from her drink. 

“Oh no! Michael never has a good time in the bathroom at parties!” Jeremy said, struggling to get up. He got to his feet and used all his momentum to run to the bathroom, colliding with the door. 

“Jeremy Heere, if you break my house I’ll kill you!” Brooke called casually from the living room. 

Michael opened the door. 

“Leave me alone, Jeremy.” He said, “I just need like, a minute.” 

Jeremy drunkenly forced his way into the bathroom, leaning on the counter for support so he could look at Michael and remain standing up. 

“Jeremy!” Michael gasped, somewhat shocked at his friend’s sudden and ungraceful entrance into the bathroom. “I just needed a _minute_ ,”

“I’m sorry!” Jeremy blurted, looking up at his friend, gripping the counter a little more as he tried to focus on Michael’s face and not the spinning room. 

“What?” Michael sounded surprised.

“I’m sorry- tongue was like too much- it was just like- it was good, and I was into, and you taste like all of the holidays exploded in your mouth and-”

“What?” Michael repeated, sounding even more confused than before.

“I got too into it!” Jeremy wailed. Michael quickly pushed the bathroom door shut behind Jeremy, giving him a serious look.

“You _liked_ it? Jeremy Heere, you’re the straightest guy I know- what do you mean you _liked_ it?” Michael went over a million and one scenarios in his head as his brain tried to process this new information, and he was pretty sure it was going to explode on him. There was no way his brain had a good enough CPU or RAM or whatever to handle this.

“I can change my mind!” Jeremy said defensively, crossing his arms before realizing it was best to keep one arm steady on the sink. “I can, can’t I?”

“Y-yeah…” Michael stammered.

“Great. Can I kiss you again?” Jeremy asked, leaning forward so much that Michael feared he’d tip over again. He reached out his hands to steady Jeremy.

“Uh. Sure?” 

“Awesome.” Jeremy nearly knocked their skulls together as he went for it with more enthusiasm than he saw the socially awkward teen normally put toward things. And with that Michael lost all his inhibitions and let the moment happen. One long hot moment, interrupted by a frantic knocking at the door.

“Guys, I hate to cock block but I am gonna _throw up_.” Rich whined from the other side.

“Oh fuck,” Michael said, and opened the door. Rich nearly fell onto the toilet, he ran for it so fast. Michael shuddered at the retching noises. 

“Do you, uh… do you want anything?” Jeremy asked. Michael gave him a look, could Jeremy really be taking care of anyone in his drunken state? 

“I want Jake to hold my hair back.” Rich whined into the toilet bowl. 

“Rich, your hair is like… really short.” Jeremy said. Rich glared over his shoulder. 

“Then I want him to pet my hair while I throw up, is that too much to ask?” 

“I don’t know man, that’s kinda g-” Jeremy started, but Michael slapped his hand over his mouth. 

“Nope! Not at all!” Michael said, dragging Jeremy away, “I’ll get him!” 

“Thanks, bro.” Rich said. Michael wasn’t sure if he was thanking him or the toilet, but either way… 

When everyone was finally settled back into the living room, more or less exhausted, Chloe suggested presents. She could tell Brooke was at her wit’s end and needed everyone out of the house soon or she might burn out. 

Jenna had rigged the game, so everyone was relatively pleased with the gifts they received from their gift exchange partner. Chloe was the last to give her present, smiling a little as she handed a small silver box to Brooke.

“I know this Christmas hasn’t been picture perfect exactly… but I’m glad I got to spend it with you. Thanks for throwing an amazing party and getting us all together for the holidays, Brooke.” Chloe watched as she began to open the box.

Brooke’s face lit up.

“It’s a promise ring. Because I promise I’ll always be yours.” Chloe said. Wow that sounded even cheesier than it did in her head, but Brooke looked elated, tears streaming down her cheeks as she hugged the little box. Maybe Christmas was saved after all.

Brooke kissed Chloe, grinning the whole time. Their friends clapped around them, Jake whistling in the background. 

They parted, but Brooke was still leaning her forehead against her girlfriend, still grinning as she addressed their friends. 

“Hey guys, get the fuck out of my house.”

**Author's Note:**

>  
> 
> Happy Holidays! Please leave kudos, we need them to bribe Santa.


End file.
